Sex Panther Cologne – Will Most Likely Get You Laid This Valentine’s Day

Cool, Gadgets — By

sex_pantherThis cologne is so potent, it’s banned in nine countries, guaranteed to work more than 60% of the time, and it’s made from real tiger parts.  This cologne is so rare that it’s only sold HERE.

Their official description:

Quite honestly, if you don’t get lucky wearing Sex Panther we can only assume you’ve got a face like a bucket of smashed crabs. Or something like that. Women will be reduced to slobbering heaps of desire once they get a whiff, so don’t even try wearing it if you’re not manly. A moustache helps too.

So what does Sex Panther actually smell of? Well despite the claims of Ron Burgundy’s colleagues, it doesn’t smell like a turd covered in burnt hair or a used diaper filled with Indian food. 

In a nutshell it smells like desire. And it’s really rather delightful. Imagine wearing a midnight black t-shirt with a wolf airbrushed on the front and a shark arm-wrestling a Sherman tank on the back. Well it’s like that but in cologne form.

Despite its potency, Sex Panther can be applied like regular fragrance but regular users (ie: us) recommend applying it by the handful to any exposed skin and then pouring a generous amount down the front of the pants*. After all, romance is the only sport that requires two balls. Rrrrr! 

If you haven’t already twigged (durr, Earth calling Mr Gullible), Sex Panther is a rather tongue-in-cheek product. But it’s beautifully presented in a fabulously ill-judged retro bottle and it might just give you the confidence to strut around the office in true Anchorman style. So what are you waiting for? Whack that Buy button and let’s go see if we can make this little kitty purr. 

* Not really. 

Source: http://nextround.net/2009/02/09/sex-panther-cologne-just-in-time-for-v-day/

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